Sea Monkeys
by Hunger4Righteousness
Summary: Roxanne brings Minion a gift with unexpected results, revealing a previously unknown aspect of Minion's personality.
1. Mischievous Minion

_**I started this story with a different ending in mind, but it wrote itself this way. **_

_**I do not own Sea Monkeys or Megamind. Just writing for fun (not profit) when I should be doing other things.**_

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"Hey, Minion. I have a little something for you," Roxanne said, setting a wrapped gift on his workstation.

"Really? For me? What is it?" Minion's round eyes were all aglow as he opened the ribbon, pulled out the gift and read the box. "Sea Monkeys?"

"Yeah! When I was little, every kid wanted Sea Monkeys," she explained. "Nobody really knew what they were, and the advertising was a huge joke. Anyway, I happened to see them in a shop and I thought of you. I mean, not that I think _you're_ a Sea Monkey! I just thought you might find them interesting. You know, a new kind of aquatic life to check out." She grinned at him. The fact was, she felt a little sorry for Minion these days. He was spending more time by himself while she and Megamind enjoyed more time together alone. Being the sweet piscean creature he was, he never complained. In fact he seemed very pleased with their relationship, but she couldn't help wondering if he was lonely.

"Thanks, Ms Ritchie! That's very thoughtful of you." He was already reading the instruction sheet with great interest.

"Ok then, let me know what you think of them later, huh? And Minion," she added, "Thanks for being so understanding."

He looked up and smiled at her. "Don't worry about that, Ms Ritchie. If he's happy and you're happy, I'm happy." She smiled back at him.

* * *

Since it was after midnight, it was surprising to see a light glowing through the doorway to Minion's workroom. He must have forgotten to turn it off, she thought. Carrying her glass of water, she padded through the darkened Lair toward the light. As she got closer, she heard Minion's voice. Is he talking to himself? He is spending too much time alone, she mused guiltily.

The sidekick was sitting looking intently at the Sea Monkey aquarium on his desk. "I don't think you really want to do that," he said to it.

"Minion? What are you doing?"

"Oh, just chatting with the Sea Monkeys," he explained, looking up to see her in the doorway. "Sorry if I woke you up."

"You didn't," she said, holding up the glass of water. "But why… um, why are talking to them?"

"I looked up Sea Monkeys on the internet while I was waiting for them to hatch, and let me tell you, there's a lot of misinformation out there!"

"No kidding…" Roxanne knew first hand. She'd made the mistake of googling 'RoxannexMegamind' one evening. "So what's the real dirt on Sea Monkeys?" she asked, taking a seat next to the desk and sipping her water.

"They're here to take over the world."

She choked and coughed on the liquid. "What?"

"Well, that's what they said," he motioned toward the small container where several tiny creatures could be seen swimming aimlessly.

Roxanne coughed and laughed. "Are you serious? First of all, they actually speak and you understand them, which is amazing enough. But they really think they're going to take over the world?"

"Apparently," Minion answered. Then he whispered to her conspiratorially, "I don't think size has much meaning to them." He nodded knowingly.

Roxanne giggled again. "What's the plan? Are they going to get themselves flushed and take over the city one toilet at a time? Today, Metro City sanitation system – tomorrow the world!"

Minion glanced at the Sea Monkeys, gasped, and put a hand over the aquarium. "Don't you dare speak to Ms Ritchie like that!"

Roxanne sobered. "What did they say?"

"I can't repeat it!" Minion looked uncomfortable. "I just hope you-know-who can't translate their language."

"Well, if they're going to be like that, maybe we'd better just flush them after all." She wasn't going to be dissed by a nasty group of miniscule briny thugs. The thought of Megamind becoming furious at the tank's teeny occupants made her smile though.

"NO! That's exactly what they want. They want to be flushed while still alive, of course, and sometimes they play dead to get into the water supply. It's all part of their plan..." He looked at her with wide, serious eyes.

"Minion." She narrowed her eyes at him. "Are you putting me on?" He possessed a sneaky streak that made things interesting around the Lair sometimes. You never knew what sort of harmless, practical joke would pop up next.

"I am very serious, Ms Ritchie!" His fishy orbs glanced side to side. "We'd probably better test our water supply soon."

She looked at her glass of water and stood up. "Ok, well, I'm headed back to bed. Maybe this is your chance to play hero! You know where we keep the bleach, right?" She smirked at him, said good night, and left. As she walked back to the bedroom, she heard him talking softly to the Sea Monkeys again.

"You heard her, boys. No funny business, or you'll get bleached!"

Crawling back into bed woke Megamind who reached a hand out to touch her arm. "You're cold. Where have you been?" He slid over and wrapped his arms and legs around her. She sighed and relaxed against him, loving the warmth.

"I was talking to Minion. He's still up, chatting with his Sea Monkeys. You'll never believe what he told me!"

Megamind snickered. "Did he give you that story about how they're here to take over the world? He told me that when I was ten!"

"What! You mean… oh, that snot! I totally fell for it!" She sat up indignantly.

Megamind tugged her back down. "Save it for morning." He began laughing again. "Did you really believe him?"

"I am SO going to get him back for this…"

In his workroom, Minion was chuckling to himself as he signed his name to a sketch he'd just finished for Ms Ritchie - little Sea Monkeys in Black Mambas.


	2. Roxanne's Revenge

(Two weeks later…)

Snap, snap! Snap, snap!

The odd sound came from the kitchen area, so he walked down the hallway to see what was going on. "What are you doing, Ms Ritchie?" asked Minion, genuinely puzzled at why she was staring at a closet, whacking two wooden spoons together.

She jumped and turned at the sound of his voice. "Oh Minion! Could you help me out? I saw a sea-bat in here! I'm just sure it was!" She looked pretty frightened.

"What's a… sea-bat?" he asked skeptically. "I've never heard of it."

Glancing toward the open broom closet again, she explained, "They're these little flying animals with really sharp teeth. Kind of like regular bats, but they dive into water to eat small fish. They're really rare. My grandfather used to tell me about watching them over the lake at night when he was a boy, but nobody sees them much anymore. I was washing some coffee cups in the sink, and I think I saw one swoop over my head. It must have been attracted to the splashing dishwater." She pointed. "I think it went in there. They hate sharp sounds, so I'm trying to scare it out again." She hit the spoons together again with a sharp crack. "Get two more spoons!"

Minion wasn't about to argue. He had an aversion to bats and rats and any kind of rodent. They'd had to evict plenty of them when they first moved into the evil lair. And one that was attracted to water was even worse - _he_ was in water! What if it swooped into his habitat? He grabbed a couple wooden spoons and began tapping them together, peering into the closet opening, trying not to envision having a wrestling match with a flying rat with razor teeth. "How do you think it got in?"

"They live near bodies of water, and the lake's right nearby. I'm guessing it just flew into the secret entrance by accident." She paused somberly. "Minion, I don't want to scare you, but you might want to cover your sphere with something. You know, in case it dive-bombs you." She handed him a checkered dishtowel, which he threw over himself quickly. "Oh, I know! I'll go get the de-gun! Stay here and keep the stick handy. You might have to try to knock it down if it comes out of there." She looked at him worriedly. "They're really quick, so watch it."

Great, he thought, pulling out the forget-me-stick. Leave the fish-alien to try to evacuate a flying, fish-eating rodent! Standing guard with his weapon and his spoons tapping together, towel over his head, he watched the closet opening nervously until he finally heard two pairs of footsteps rapidly approaching his post. Howls of laughter suddenly assaulted his ears, and he turned to see Roxanne taking his photo with her cell phone, grinning like a Cheshire cat. Megamind leaned on the doorframe, holding his sides and trying not to collapse onto the floor with laughter.

Roxanne cocked an eyebrow at Minion. "Gotcha."


	3. Ms BlueberryHead

"So, you're sure this will wear off later? Because if it doesn't, my boss is going to have a _fit_!"

"Trust me..."

* * *

Minion could hear voices and so he followed the sound into Megamind's workroom. Evening was the usual time for Ms Ritchie to stop in, and she often stayed beyond that as well, so he wasn't at all surprised to see her there sitting on the couch talking with the blue genius as they both worked, her on her laptop and him at his drafting table. It was a typical scene. That is, until Roxanne turned around to greet him over the back of the couch.

"Oh hi, Minion! I wondered where you were. Hadn't seen you yet tonight."

Minion's toothy smile faded away as his mouth slowly dropped open, and he stared unblinkingly at her. "Ms Ritchie! …are you…are you feeling alright?"

Roxanne looked perplexed. "Um, yes, I'm feeling fine. Why? What's the matter? Minion, you look like you've seen a ghost!"

"When was the last time you looked at yourself today?"

"I don't know. I came here from the station, didn't stop at home. It must have been around lunch. Why? What's the-"

"Just a minute! Stay right there! I'll be right back!" he told her and turned to Megamind who was busily working at his table. "Sir... Sir! Look at Ms Ritchie!"

"What are you going on about, Minion? I look at her all the time…" He finally glanced up from his designing and noticed Minion had already rushed from the room. He and Roxanne looked at each other and snickered.

Returning at nearly a dead run, which was impressive for a heavy, metal mecha-suit-wearing fish, Minion slid to a stop in the doorway again. "Sir! Didn't you notice?"

"Notice what, you goofy fish?"

"Ms Ritchie!" He turned to Roxanne and held out to her the hand mirror he'd gone to retrieve. "Now Ms Ritchie… don't get upset…I'm sure there's something that can be done…"

Roxanne looked in the glass at herself and tipped her head to the side. "Hey... Now that you mention it I do look kind of…blue." She glanced at Megamind. "Do you see it?"

Looking over at her, he put down his pencil and frowned. "Yes. Yes, I see it now. You're right. You definitely have a blue tinge about you."

Minion looked from one to the other in disbelief. The two of them hardly seemed upset at all. But Ms Ritchie's skin was nearly as blue as her boyfriend's!

"Hmm. Well, you know what this means, Megs."

Raising his brows, he looked at her and nodded. "We should have been using condoms after all."

"AHHH!" Minion covered his mouth with a hand, but his gasp was still loud enough to hear as he stumbled backward and crashed to the ground.

Roxanne jumped up and rushed over to him despite being somewhat handicapped by laughing so hard she couldn't see straight. Megamind was completely unconcerned for his friend, draped helplessly over the drafting table as his laughter rang around in the room.

"Minion!" Roxanne tried to revive him between fits of giggling. "Minion, it's ok!"

He finally looked up at them both and groaned at their amusement. "Oh… you two are so in for it now…"


End file.
